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Amy Alford

Breaking Generational Curses and Stopping the Blame Game.

Updated: Oct 17, 2020

I purchased 8 stop signs this week for a project at my husband's company. Those big red signs that are just blaring at you to STOP each and every day! When they arrived, they sure looked even bigger in person and drew immediate attention. And yet, how many of us roll past those big red signs every day?


I wrote this blog for others stuck in the blame game of life. However, today it really hit me... I've been rolling on through the blame game of life like so many others. Never really taking the time to fully stop.


"But my husband has battled cancer this last year..."

"But my daughter did such and such...."

"But I am trying to run a business in a pandemic..."

And the most compelling, the "If you only knew..." meant to hint at that supercharged skeleton in the closet.


I hope today this blog post will be a game-changer. Literally. Many of us are still too busy blaming our past, present, or future on everyone but ourselves. Today, take the time to completely STOP. Allow yourself to stop dead in your tracks and finally check out of the blame game. Trade-in your jersey and move on to the winning team. A team fully equipped with support and accountability and a team that will allow you to use every last second on the clock to finish at your best.


Stop Sign Stop The Blame Game Absolutely Amyable logo

Thanks to many of you who have cheered me on already as I embarked on my passion through Absolutely Amyable. Your encouragement has already helped turn many of my stop signs to that bright green GO!


I hope through this post and many others that you will stay sensitive to that little voice urging you just a bit further, a bit deeper, a bit out of your comfort zone, and soon find yourself in the midst of a community of teammates working together for that one BIG win.



Winning Girls Softball Game

It takes real courage, vulnerability, and is often a daunting task to dig deep into your own raw places and to take time to open those areas for others to see. It takes guts and grit to share your heartstopping moments with others. And it takes tears... I am learning to embrace these fountains and to share my story to help shape your story.


Let's follow the game of life (blame and all), examine our fan club/audience, read the rule book, find the right coach, and then join together to make sure each of us finish our race.


Break Generational Curses Stop Blame Game Fingers Pointing


Welcome to the blame game where you are disqualified before you even start.


Too many people are disqualifying themselves because of their very own blame game. You've accepted your past as your present, you've attracted the wrong audience and you are selling yourself short. The super bowl stadium worth of people that God purposed for you to reach is now sitting alone and defeated because you won't leave your personal blame game.


It is heart-wrenching to know that so many people (especially young people) feel destined to fail and are stuck in misery because of not only their past but because of the generations that have come before them. They feel cursed, punished, and pre-destined to repeat the same"sins" from past generations.


How happy the enemy must be for disqualifying entire teams of people, for closing doors before the first pitch could even be thrown, and for using a rule book of condemnation to silence calling and purpose within our young and our old generations.



Soccer Player Defeated Loss



The time is now. Here is your pre-game huddle.


Double and triple check your game plan, re-read the rule book, and make sure your following the right coach.


Today's game will involve taking personal inventory and include a baggage drop-off zone.


Let go of the past and let go of things you feel have been passed through many generations straight to you. To find victory in today's game of life you must believe you are loved, valued, and have the potential to impact others for good.


Step out of the blame game, adopt your new family history, drop your baggage at the door and enter the stadium ready to roll. There are thousands of people who need you to show up, baggage-free, full of strength and endurance, and ready to run your race well.


Success flows freely once you have the right coach, your head in the right game, and a rule book that is foolproof.


Coach Game Field Team Huddle


Say goodbye for good to generational curses and the blame game.


1. Examine your family history without letting it become your grim reality.


Most of us are aware of how much our family history plays a key in our risk factors for certain diseases. In nursing, we spend the first few minutes of any doctor visit going over a patient's family history in detail. Thanks to research, we are now able to determine which diseases show hereditary and genetic components, and then we can monitor your health more closely in certain areas based on the risk factors noted.


However, remember as you dig deeper into your family tree, there are ugly parts to everyone's history that begin to emerge. Do not let it weigh you down and stake a claim on your present life. This digging is meant to help you become aware not paralyzed, to become much more watchful and prevent disease, and to give you a greater chance at a healthier tomorrow.


Nurse Hands EKG Red Heart Life

*nurse note: this article is also a great reminder to also seek licensed professional help*



2. Realize you are made new in Christ.


Heredity does play a large role in your eye color, hair color, skin color, and risk factors for many diseases; however, as a child of the King we have been forgiven and made new in the ways that matter most. The new that nows lives within you can help heal the "generational curses" that you are speaking over your life daily. You do not have to become who your father was, or his father, or your mother, or her mother.


New Mindset New in Chirst

Once you establish your walk with Christ, the good work can begin within you. Your words and actions will soon give evidence of your faith in God and will help you experience the blessings that only God can bestow. The seeds that He plants inside your heart take root and the fruit that is produced is your key to longevity.


Pray for the fruits of the spirit to provide you with the assurance and evidence of your deep-rooted faith. A healthy heart will produce love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.


Fruits of the Spirit Longevity Absolutely Amyable


3. Update your family history, zero your balance, and check out of the blame game for good.

Name: Child of God

Family history: Redeemed, son or daughter of The Risen King.

Weight: Weightless. I'm floating on the clouds in glory, every weight has been lifted.

Any complaints or concerns? No, I'm healed by the blood of the Lamb.

And best of all - it is all FREE! No insurance to file, no deductible to meet. Instead, there is an endless supply of health benefits with eternal promises! You are guaranteed to never be dropped, fees will never increase, and it covers ALL - no matter how grim your past.


Nurse Holding Heart Absolutely Amyable


Join the winning team where obedience is a must. Uphold these two rules for a starting position in every game.

1. "Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength." Mark 12:30


I have felt an urging that God wants us all to return to the basics. If there has ever been a time of living simply, a time to evaluate your priorities, it is now. It is amazing to me to think that something as simple as loving God with all your heart can solve a multitude of problems. A simple step of falling in love with your Creator can make this frustrating, confusing, complex world we live in, fall right into place!

When we fall in love with God, our confusion settles, we let go of needing all the answers, and we look to Him as the complete source of strength. We stop rationalizing, interpreting, and reasoning with a God who already knows what is in our best interest.

EKG Strip Fall In Love With God Absolutely Amyable Quote


2. The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:31


When we truly fall in love with Him, we begin to love our neighbor, our teammate, and even our adversary. When your core is solid and your eyes are fixed, you will find that love abounds freely.

Reach out to others daily. There are hurting people all around us. Remember how you felt while losing in the blame game. Allow God to use you to love on your neighbor today.



Get to know your new audience and making the last minutes of the game count.


1. Too often in life, we celebrate the wrong stuff with the wrong people.

One sure way to find yourself heading back to that past history which will lead to destruction is to get caught back up with your blame game friends. The ones who celebrate the wrong stuff. The ones who value things that can be seen far greater than the things that matter most to God.


Make sure you've completely left the old, keep a strong connection and love for God, and surround yourself with your new teammates who will make accountability a priority every day.


Football Fans Stadium Cheering


2. Desire a deeper relationship with God and keep an audience of one as your main focus.


There are many things fighting for your attention and our faith often requires us to move forward and to take a few steps before we can experience full clarity and focus. Always remember that God is your target audience. Stay focused. Once you have purposed in your heart to love him with all your heart and to love your neighbor as yourself, then the extra expectations from people can be dropped and you will soon find freedom and clarity for life.


What's most important to God is often least impressive to the world. Be happy with an audience of one.


Target Audience God Audience of One Quote Absolutely Amyable



3. The very last few seconds of the game.


What if this is the only game "they" (your audience) will attend. What if this moment watching you handle all the pressures in your game of life will be the defining moment of whether or not someone else will choose to join the winning team.


Life is fragile. In the last year, I have sat on oncology floors in hospitals and watched life pass by outside of the window in my husband's hospital room. I've walked the halls with dying patients in rooms nearby and I've felt the heaviness of the possibility of losing a spouse.


However, what I have learned most from days as a nurse and from life is that when it comes down to the final seconds of the game, the score really does not matter. The stats of your life do not matter. The size of your fan club will not matter. We all win some and we lose some.


So today remember:


2 Timothy 4:7-8: I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith: Henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, shall give me at that day: and not to me only, but unto all them also that love his appearing.


Runners Finish Line Finish the Race


4. The buzzer has sounded and the time clock has ended. The earthly game is finished.


I can’t wait to be reunited with some of my biggest fans when the buzzer to my final game in life has sounded. However, I am most eager to celebrate the ultimate victory face to face with my audience of one.


Here’s to the many of you reading here now, I hope you leave the blame game. I hope you sign on to the winning team. I hope you seek after an audience of one and when the last second on the game clock passes, I hope we will be standing together. Blame free. And in awe of the ONE.


Absolutely Amyable Quote Game Clock Quote Friends Arm in Arm

Make a few deposits into someone’s fan club today. You never know when it could be right before their last buzzer sounds.

Absolutely Amyable Logo Red Heart EKG Strip Amy Alford






P.S. Don't miss out. Join me here!

Welcome to Absolutely Amyable. Here you will find your calm cushion in life's chaos.

I have renewed resolve to use my story to help shape your story. To pass on to the next generation the power of meaningful connection and care for others.

May each of us who swore by oaths in our professions recite them daily and vow to uphold them. May each of us help guide others to find and fulfill their inner calling.

But You're ___________ *insert your name here

Welcome to the front lines!







Amy Alford Absolutely Amyable











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